I've been thinking about this for a while but never got around to posting it and to set things straight, I'm not talking about rituals or the actual worship of satan as many Christians worship God. I'm talking about the theroy behind it.  The acceptance of sin.

The fact is every person I've met, claiming they're Chirstian or not, has lied or simply talked shit.  EVERYONE I've met has done this.  If someone out there is strong enough all the time, good for them.  I'm really impressed with people who are that strong but I've never met them. 
Most churchs even acknowledge everyone sins and if you are sorry you can ask for forgiveness and it will be there.  At the same time church says everyone sins and sins are bad satanists say everyone sins and it's ok.  Think of all the people that give into lust.  All the people that think vengeance is ok.  Sending people to prison and sueing are a big part of our judicial system in America and yet this completely goes against "not judging people."  And everyone fucking judges people.

It just seems so much healthier to find pleasure in sins that we all commit anyway instead of trying to find excusses for forgiveness or even lie to ourselves.  I don't know I'm just ranting about things.  I just have a stupid childish wish that everyone could be good friends and constantly hang out.   

I have no idea.  I really wish I knew and someone would post the answer in a comment cause I'm lost.  People come and go in my life and I can't seem to hold onto anyone.  Is it my fault?  I'm sure I've fucked up a couple times, just like others.  Why can't I get someone to pick up the phone when I call them?  Why don't I have pictures of me with my old friends?  What the fuck have I been doing my entire life?  I'm kinda hoping it is just my depression making me the the negatives and not making me forget the good intereactions I've had with people. 

So much has happened since last year on Halloween...  We've been up and down hundreds of times, but even after what we've been through I still love you.  I always will.

I remember when we first met.  We were talking together with Sharon on xfire in the brand new KW cult.  I wanna say she didn't really know you too well but it might be because you've changed so much.  I still don't remember what it was that caused me to worry so much when she broke your heart...I had someone I was interested in but I still wanted to try to talk you through it. 

In the end I chose you and you were still the first person to give me a chance.  Everyone else was too afraid.  Your still always here when I need you unlike everyone else, and that alone is enough reason to keep on loving you.  Sometimes I get tired of your sarcastic remarks and sometimes I get tired of listening to you tourture yourself...but I never want to give you up.  I just want you to be happy and stop crying.  Love you.